the work of mourning

she took the branch from the tree
salted the earth with her tears
as she wrapped it for the journey

she planted it in the garden
there between the spring flowers
the crocuses, the daffodils, all unseen

now she sits amongst the lilac blossom
the leaves whispering around her
it is not grief they speak, but memory

for our nan

how to choose the words to tell you about our nan? we can tell you where and when our nan was born, that she had one sister and three brothers. that, at the age of 14, nan went into service and at the age of 18 she joined the ATS, where she was to meet our grandad.

these are some of the happenings from our nan’s life but we would like to share with you our nan, as we remember her.

all of us will have so many of our own precious memories but did you know that our nan could tickle a trout? it was quite easy apparently! sundays at nan’s house meant roast dinner with all the trimmings – her roast spuds were THE best, and her apple courting cake really was legendary. nan always had to make extra for us, some for now and some for later.

although nanny never had much, what she did have was always shared. nan’s door was always open and everyone was always welcome through it. anyone who befriended one of the family became one of the family and everyone who came into nan’s home always went away with a full tummy.

nan was always there for us, to listen to us ... to give us advice. but no matter what happened in our lives, no matter what choices we made, nan never judged or criticised. nanny was happy if we were happy and was always so proud of even the smallest achievement.

i do mean this in the nicest way, but i won’t need to tell you that nan had her stubborn and contrary moments! when nan would tell you about her day, or something that had happened, we would pretend to tell her off, saying ‘nan, you can be so contrary sometimes’. she would look at you, the biggest smile would light up her face and she would say ‘yes, but i am lovely with it!’. and she really was, and that would get her off the hook so many times. nan had such a sense of humour and boy, did she have a wicked laugh!

did you know that nan had a jar of magic cream in her cupboard? when we were little and had bumped or grazed ourselves, nanny’s magic cream would make an appearance and with a little dab of cream whatever hurt had ailed us would be cured. it wasn’t until we were quite a bit older that one of us asked what nanny’s magic cream had been ... it was a tub of nivea! and the magic ingredient ... the one that stopped the pain and the tears ... that was love.

nan shared her love of nature with us, even the shortest walk would have nan passing on the names of flowers, plants and trees and she loved to watch the birds feeding in her garden, the antics of the squirrels trying to steal the bird’s food would have her in stitches.

nan also passed on strength, determination, so much love, the importance of loved ones and i hope, a little of that contrariness! we just hope that we can be as ‘lovely with it’ too!

for every memory we commit to paper, we remember another dozen that we haven’t mentioned here. what a lovely legacy though ... a lifetime of love, laughter and happy memories.

with all of our love, good night nanny, God bless and don’t let those bed bugs bite!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

what we miss about our nan.

i miss nan now she’s gone.
i miss her threatening to hit me with her stick.
i miss her smile as she takes the swipe.
i miss telling her how much we love her.
i miss her saying “love you lots”.
i miss her sitting in her chair.
i miss her roast potatoes.
i miss her “aunt bessie” yorkshire puds.
i miss her “apple courting cake”.
i miss talking to her, never judging.
i miss her support.
but most of all, we miss you, nan.

quote of the week

from ken livingstone, on his 'five children by three women' shocker being 'discovered' by some tabloid or other (don't ya just love 'em!).

"I have never discussed my private life because it is not a relevant factor. I don't think anybody in this city will be shocked by what two consenting adults do, as long as you don't include children, animals and vegetables"

just a wee p.s. to the original post - i was on the bbc site this morning and a member of the concerend public had written to express his dismay that mr livingstone hadn't included 'dead people' on his of things that two consenting adults shouldn't include! what can we infer from this mr sun reporter?!